The F Word(s)

This topic or post is a very delicate and sensitive one so if you are looking for trouble, someone to cancel or throw eggs at (for those of you who are still old school), this one is for you!

The biggest movie released in 2023 is probably "Barbie". Even if you had not watched the movie, you would have heard of the doll or watched the cartoon movies on Kids Central or something. I strolled into the cinema with zero expectations and not a clue about what the movie is about. I was chilling with my popcorn but as the movie dragged on, I was sinking into my chair and curling my toes. Only one thing and three letters kept resurfacing in my mind - HUH.

Don't get me wrong. The premise of the movie was not terrible. The acting was also not disastrous. But... I cannot help but wonder why are we, in 2023, still lamenting about the lack of female representation or rights. I am not saying that the world is already perfectly balanced, as all things should be. Certain cultures and countries still need us to shed light on this. However we can't just keep saying that we are bullied by men and it is impossible to be a woman (as mentioned in the movie) in the modern world (or known as "Los Angeles" in the movie). This is not really a realistic portrayal of the real world today.

Cutting to the chase: the whole movie was just a feminist agenda wrapped up in a pink bow. Again, nothing wrong with this. But I think it was quite overdone and the movie was like a propaganda...

I think a level-headed person (not just feminists) is concerned about the oppression of women. It is about the edifice of the oppression and not really about men versus women. In other words, it is about "what" is oppressing us and not the "who". In the movie, Barbies ruled their land and did not even bother giving any meaningful job to the Kens. The Kens, even if they were capable, were therefore not able to contribute and earn some credit. Strangely, nobody thought that was screwed up but let us just look past that. Conversely, in the real world, men were depicted as sexual, egotistical and dominating a-holes, from random people walking along the street to the police officers to the big shots at corporations. All jerks. It makes one wonder if, collectively, men is the cause of said opppression. The movie did not really address this. To make things worse, at the end of the movie, when the Kens wanted to be more useful, they were put down by the Barbies and given less than important roles to just placate them. Is it to show the male audience that this is what they actually do when they claim they respect women but, in fact, do not? Is it tongue in cheek? Considering that the movie was quite preachy and there is a big percentage of kids in the audience, maybe they should tie this loose end?

It just seems like a lot of whining and the best part is... girls and women coming out the theatre and fist pumping - hyping each other up that we need equality and men just have it so much easier! It definitely is not irony or punny when there is literally a 3 minute long monologue about how it is IMPOSSIBLE to be a woman. Yeah, impossible. And the fact that our grandmothers are in their 80s or 90s... gosh, they must be unicorns or something. (Read below if you have not watched the movie).

Again, I believe some parts of it and have experienced what she is saying personally. But dissect this carefully - so...
(a) men can just be fat and ain't nobody gonna say anything or make fun of him or assume this fat guy is just the class clown of the bunch
(b) men can go around asking for money cause yeah, ain't nobody expect them to be the breadwinners or offer to pay for dinner and everything else for their female dates
(c) men can go around being jerks and crush dreams and that is why the movie "Horrible Bosses" starring Kevin Spacey is not relatable and makes no sense - the casting director should have gotten a female boss to portray that role.

OK, you get the drift. I think the main takeaway is that maybe... just maybe... it is not about lack of equality. Because if that was what we wanted, then ok, ask your female friends to carry the groceries, not expect the men to pay for dates and propose to women, not ridicule men who are scared of insects and refuse to kill the pests at home, etc, since both genders are equally capable of doing these things and the expectations for each gender is the exact same. The fact is that we are not made the same and we will never be the same. Even among the same gender, we are not the same. So... perhaps it is about treating each other with respect and fairness. It is not a men versus women problem. If we just realise that sometimes we cannot conveniently and naively pin the blame on a single group, maybe we can look into where these expectations come from and what we can do to be better (The chinese saying goes like this : 一竿子打翻一船人)

Maybe we can look within. Maybe women also make it difficult for other women to exist. For example, who is buying (and therefore also supporting) these magazines that feature skinny female models on the cover every damn time? I do not think Vogue and Elle and Marie Claire and Cosmopolitan and Glamour are catering to men. We complain that they promote body image issues but at the same time, we think they are pretty. God knows that even if our male friends, boyfriends or husbands tell us that we look good, we do not believe them. And oh yeah, they also do not even know who Christy Turlington, Gisele Bündchen and Kendall Jenner are... but whose fault anyway? These damn men!